You’ve probably never thought about it, but lying to or faking it with someone negates your ability to experience love with them.
Love is the highest purpose of life. From a very young age you will be given opportunities to practice learning how to love. You can’t cheat at the love tests for years and then expect to show up for the big exam and ace it. Love, like math, builds on prior learning. If you failed Algebra, you won’t pass Calculus.
If you’ve lived years using people, pretending to be something you are not, faking feelings, lying to “protect” people, eventually you’ll want real love with someone, and it will elude you.
To give and receive love you must first be willing to risk being honest, truthful with the other person. Being honest is about revealing your true self and feelings as well as sticking to the facts about things.
Honesty is very risky and most people avoid it believing lies are better for all involved.
Why do we lie to people we claim to love?
- If they know the truth about us and how we feel, they might not be able to handle it
- They might not like us if we are honest, and then we’d get hurt
- They might not continue giving us the things we want from them if we tell them how we really feel or the truth about things
Lying to people you love is rooted in the worst kind of pride.
The reasons you lie are based on a belief that you know best and can control a situation and another human being without consequence. But there’s always a consequence to every lie. Lots of little lies pile up to become a pattern of dishonesty. Some big lies blow up and destroy relationships and lives.
If you want to know love, begin practicing honesty with people in your life. It might not go so well at first. The reasons you lie may seem to be verified. However, there’s no getting around the true cost of love, and it rests on being honest and truthful.
Matthew 22: 37 – 40
“Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.”